My mind is completely blank, well, not COMPLETELY. I can at least think about when to eat, go to the bathroom, and sleep. Of course all of my basic needs. I just don’t know what happened to my creativity. If I search deep down in my brain, past the cobwebs and spiders, I assume I will find it. Maybe it jumped ship when I became an adult and parent. Well, I’m hoping that’s not true because I do miss being a kid and being creative.
My daughter is quite creative. She has found ways to turn boring in to fun. I personally find being at home boring but when I ask her if she wants to go to the mall or just out she would rather play with her Webkinz and Littlest Pet Shop toys. She’ll try to engage me in her play, but I’m always making excuses as to why I don’t want to play. My real excuse is that I lost my creativity. I’m convinced that she took it from me when she was born, along with all of the nutrients I had in my body and my little bit of eyesight that allowed me to go without wearing my glasses.
Oh well, all I can do now is get my creativity back. Obviously, I can’t snatch her toys and try to play with them on my own. I will have to do this carefully and secretly. If I want to get my creativity back, I can’t let her know that’s my goal. If she found out she would do everything in her nature to keep it from me. A kid without creativity, just isn’t a kid. So my plan is to “pretend” (if I can even remember how to do that) that I want to play with her Webkinz (personally, I miss the “Tamagachis”) and watch her closely, making myself aware of how she is using MY creativity. If I can figure out how she uses it then that’s my ticket to get it back.
Once I learn how to use that creativity that I’ve unconciously given away, then it will magically come back to me. Then she will have to figure out how to get her own creativity. She could possibly sneak it away from one of her friends, but I have a feeling that most parents are carefully planning how to snatch back their creativity from their kids. So there won’t be much left for my daughter. Ha, ha!
I’m glad that she is creative because, in reality, she will help me re-teach myself to be creative. Then my blogs may actually have a point. I promise that there was a time that I wrote really great stories. That time was about seven years ago. I do know that I can write a lot about being a parent. That is one thing that I do know loads about.
I’n not really in to politics so you won’t hear much from me about that. I do tend to get a little depressed for no apparent reason. I also tend to think that the glass is always half empty and that definately irritates people. One of my co-workers told me that I make people want to jump off of a bridge when I talk negatively. Personally, I thought that was funny. Do I really have that much power over someone? “Mwahaha!!” I do have a new family that I’m working to become a contributing member of. It’s been awhile since I’ve had a stable relationship with anyone and I’m really enjoying it. I work in the city and commute 25 miles one way every day. I have an “on/off” relationship with God. So you may hear much about these subjects.
Looking at the gas prices, I may actually begin commuting by bus again instead of driving to work every day. I felt so good about myself when I got my license at 22!!! Although, there may be a point now where I’m just working to get to work. My employer does provide me with the benefit of a free bus pass, so when gas prices do become unbearable, I at least have another option. It’s either the bus or “horse-nap” a Clydesdale during the next holiday light up night in my neighboring town. Wouldn’t I just look silly taking a horse on the boulevard?
Okay, so I may be out of things to write about for now. I can feel my creativity coming back to me but not as fast as I like. Just like many other things in my life, it will hit me when I least expect it. Watch that be the time when I don’t have access to a computer. Oh no!
